Saturday, January 08, 2005
Housework is not like a train that you have to catch at 8:03 am--we have never seen it get up and walk away.
If at first you don't succeed, reconsider your objectives--it might not be worth it!
Shopping before December 23rd takes all the thrill away.
Early to bed and early to rise is a disgusting social habit--who thought of that one, anyway?
Women with flat stomachs should be shot before they can contribute to the gene pool--plainly, it's not normal.
Anything worth doing is worth doing at a decent hour.
If God wanted me to be grey, He wouldn't have invented Clairol.
If at first you don't succeed, try something else, for heaven's sake--what are you standing there for!
Pregnancy is when your shirttail goes from hanging on the inside to hanging on the outside, and it never goes back!
There comes a time in every woman's life when she goes from undergarments that are little whisps of chiffon to marvels of architectural engineering. It's at that point that she looks much better with her clothes on than with them off. Unfortunately, when she does take them off, everything has a tendency to go "boiiing!"
In life, you can generally either make your point or get your way. It's very rare that you can get both at the same time.
Don't bring out your canons if your .22 will do it!
If the horse is dead, get off it.
When a woman becomes a mother, regardless of age, education, philosophy, national origin, or class, she will become the newest possessor of favorite maternal sayings handed down from time out of mind. These are a sample of some of the things she will say:
"Young man/woman, you will be in this house for the rest of your life--count on it!"
"Do you plan to go out in that? You look like someone's orphan child!
"Do you live in a barn, or are you planning on closing that door?"
Or a variation on that, spoken by a member of our staff:
"I have no problem with your wearing that, as long as you also wear a sign that says, 'I never met and do not know _____________.' "
Credit cards are the company store of the 21st century.
Parts of a Wedding Invitation and Their Purpose
Here's a list of components for a wedding invitation, and their uses:
- The invitations themselves
- Inner envelope (optional)
- Outer envelope
- Reception cards (optional)
- RSVP cards/envelopes (optional)
- Tissue (optional, and often not used any more)
If you are using inner envelopes you may notice that they do not have adhesive on the flap; that is because they are not meant to be sealed. The name of the person or persons being invited are written on the inner envelope, but not their address. If your invitation is to a couple and their children, only the couple's names and their address should be written on the outer envelope; the inner envelope should have the couple's names as well as the phrase "and family," or, "and guest," but not their address.
If you are planning to invite some guests to your wedding but not to your reception, you can accomplish it by enclosing an additional card with your invitation, and these are listed below.
An RSVP card is used if you wish to have a response to your invitation to the reception. The RSVP card should be placed in its own envelope, have a postage stamp, and be addressed back to whoever has charge of the responses. It must measure at least 3.5" x 5" according to postal regulations so that it can be mailed back to you, and should be placed, already in its own envelope, in the inner envelope with the invitation. The RSVP card is typically worded with the information that there will be a reception after the ceremony, and a response from the recipient is requested.
A reception card is used when an RSVP is not required, but you are not inviting all of your guests to your reception. Additionally, you can use such an enclosure card if, for instance, you are planning a limited function after the reception, such as an additional party meant strictly for family. A reception card need not be enclosed in an envelope, and need not measure at least 3.5" x 5", because it is not meant to be mailed. It may, for instance, be of business card size. The reception card, if used, should also be placed in the inner envelope with the invitation.
A new innovation in reception cards is to include a
refrigerator magnet with your invitation that has been preprinted with the details of your wedding date and reception. Your guests will find it a helpful reminder of your wedding date, and they're much more likely to remember the date!A tissue, if used, is cut to the size of the invitation and is placed on its face. It is a holdover from the days when the ink on invitations could "bleed" and stick to the inner or outer envelope, especially in damp and/or warm weather. Recent improvements in the printing process make this enclosure unnecessary. Tissues have a tendency to crease and look worn when handled and can be difficult to keep fresh when you are assembling your invitations; that is one major reason why their use seems to be going out of style.
Which of the optional parts of a wedding invitation should you use? Your invitations are designed to serve a purpose--they invite your guests to your ceremony, and optionally to other parts of the celebration on your wedding day. Enclosures such as the RSVP card and envelope or the reception card are used to add to the terms of the invitation.
If everyone is invited to the reception and you don't need responses, simply add that part to the bottom of your invitation and don't use an enclosure at all. This is typically worded as, "Reception immediately following the ceremony/Mike's Truck Stop/34 West Motorcycle Road/Hammsville, Pennsylvania."
If not everyone will be invited to the reception, leave off those lines from the invitation, and add it to either a reception card or an RSVP card, depending on whether or not you require responses.
